It's Okay to Admit that Things are Not Easy.

In Jordan Peterson's "12 Rules For Life: An Antidote for Chaos" he tells us in Rule 7 "Pursue what is Meaningful (not what is expedient)" that "LIFE IS SUFFERING. THAT'S CLEAR. There is no more basic, irrefutable truth" (161). You may be wondering why I would quote such a terrible fact of life. Why I would tell you that it is okay to admit that you may not be okay. We have to be willing to tell ourselves that things are not perfect (and never will be) but that they can get better.

"He who has a why to live can bear almost any how." - Friedrich Nietzsche

When I had my second child I deeply suffered from postpartum depression. I was not a special case where the I had a rough labor and delivery, she was healthy, but she did struggle to eat. Whereas, my first born was eating within a couple hours of birth no problem. I don't know if my hormones were just messing with me or what but I do know that I was so depressed that I seriously contemplated suicide. I want it to be known that I am a strong woman that has persevered through some extremely terrible situations. I reached a point that I knew that I needed help so I reached out to my husband, who is not the most sympathetic person, but he saw how badly I was struggling and was picked me up off the floor. I had not been that low since I was in high school, while dealing with the trauma of my childhood.

I want to be clear that I am not here to tell you that you can do better, just don't think about it, or whatever cliche people tell people that are struggling (I may love cliches but they have a time and place). The fact is Jordan Peterson is right "LIFE IS SUFFERING" but if we take the time to find out what it is that truly brings us meaning (as Jordan would say) then we can find our happiness. I want to be clear, happiness is not a destination, it is not journey, it is a state of mind. I truly believe that if we have meaning in our lives then we will be happy because we have fulfilled our needs. We humans do not need a lot to survive, we can live with very little actually but we have to have a why.

I was able to live through my postpartum depression because I had a real reason to live. I am able to function everyday, get up, go to work, teach teenagers, go workout, get kids, feed family, put kids to bed, relax till bed if I did not have a why. For me my why is two fold, it is mostly my family but also partly the ability to work with teenagers and hopefully help them be successful in their lives. I love being a teacher, it is truly so rewarding and I could not be prouder of my profession. It is mentally and emotionally draining but it is worth every bit of that. In the end, finding your why will help you become the better you that you are meant to be. We can all be a bit better.